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Everything I Have Learned from a Kindergartener

  • I can only count to four because Mommy only gave me four cookies for lunch.
  • I don’t want Mommy to give me more cookies because then I would grow up into a giant.
  • I don’t want to be a giant because they go around stepping on cars and breaking them.
  • Giants live up in the clouds.
  • I don’t know what I learned in school today.
  • The tree cutters cut the tops off the trees behind our apartment because they were getting too big. They were growing up into outer space.
  • Grass is growing on the roof of houses.
  • Our apartment doesn’t have a chimney, but that’s okay because Daddy gave Santa Claus a key.
  • I’m going to have a new brother, but we don’t have him yet. Mommy hasn’t gone to pick him up from the hospital yet.

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